wives – All those Jokes that people send me

From Ernie:

Can you imagine yourselfÂ as the nunÂ sitting at her desk grading these papers all the while trying to keep a straight face and maintain her composure!

PayÂ specialÂ attentionÂ to theÂ wording & spelling. IfÂ you know the bible even a little,Â you’llÂ find this hilarious! Â ItÂ comes from a Catholic ElementaryÂ school test;Â kids were asked questions about the Old & New Testaments. The following statementsÂ were written by children -Â THEY HAVE NOT BEEN RETOUCHED OR CORRECTED. INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN.

1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE; GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF

2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH’S WIFE WAS JOAN OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY; BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING THE NIGHT.

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS

5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH

Continue reading “A Nun Grading Papers”

Girls gone bad!

Two women friends had gone for a girl’s night out. Both were very faithful and loving wives, however, they had gotten over enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery.

One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend, however was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them. She was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she decided to wipe with that. After the girls did their business they proceeded to go home.

The next day one of the women’s husbands was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said,

“These girl nights have got to stop! I’m starting to suspect the worst… my wife came home with no panties!!”

“That’s nothing”

said the other husband,

“Mine came back with a card stuck to her ass that said… “From all of us at the Fire Station. We’ll never forget you.”