The Cadbury’s Candy Co. and Merck Drug Co. have combined to market the new Mint flavored birth control pill that women may take immediately before sex.
The Pill will be distributed by the large major drug store chains. They’re going to be called….
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From Ernie:
A nice old story that will make you appreciate family.
My grandmother died in the 50s, but her birthday is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce.
The long walks we used to take to the store in town, the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling weeds or washing the sidewalk… Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was only about 13.
We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40 soda bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day. She told me that one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own family.
‘And always remember this thing,’ she said. ‘Be sure you marry a woman with small hands.’
‘How come, Grandma?’ I asked her.
Is Ernie the only person who get’s e-mailed jokes? Anyway, where another great joke from Ernie:
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. ‘You all have obsessions,’ he observed.
To the first mother, Mary, he said, ‘You are obsessed with eating. You’ve even named your daughter Candy.’
To the first mother, Mary, he said, ‘You are obsessed with eating. You’ve even named your daughter Candy.’
He turned to the second Mom, Ann: ‘Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child’s name, Penny.’
He turned to the third Mom, Joyce: ‘Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child’s name, Brandy.’
At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, ‘Come on, Dick, we’re leaving. Your brothers Peter and Willy are waiting for us.