Categories
marriage men women

Men Strike Back

From Ernie:

Men strike back! ! ! ! ! ! !

How many men does it take to open a beer?

None. It should be opened when she brings it.
——————————————————————-

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?

Because a woman who can’t even afford a
washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
——————————————————————–

Why do women have smaller feet than men?

It’s one of those “evolutionary things” that allows
them to stand closer to the
kitchen sink.
——————————————————————-
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

When she starts a sentence with “A man once told me…”
——————————————————————-

How do you fix a woman’s watch?

You don’t. There is a clock on the oven.
——————————————————————-

Why do men fart more than women?

Because women can’t shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
——————————————————————-

Categories
funny tasteless

A Fart …

And a wee poem from Edel, I’m almost sure I’ve seen this one before?

A fart, it is a pleasant thing,
It gives the belly ease,
It warms the bed in winter,
And suffocates the fleas.

A fart can be quiet,
A fart can be loud,
Some leave a powerful,
Poisonous cloud

A fart can be short,
Or a fart can be long,
Some farts have been known
To sound like a song……

A fart can create
A most curious medley,
A fart can be harmless,
Or silent, and deadly.

A fart might not smell,
While  others are vile,
A fart may pass quickly,
Or linger a while……

A  fart can occur
In  a number of places,
And leave everyone there,
With strange looks on their faces.

From wide-open prairie,
To small elevators,
A fart will find all of
Us sooner or later.

But that farts are all bad,
Is simply not true
We must never forget…….
Nice old farts like you!

Kinda brings a tear to your eye – doesn’t it?
Have a Good  DAY!

http://www.timony.com/jokes/2008/12/01/a-fart